Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Who I Am


I am spunky. :: I laugh a lot. :: I love my red hair. :: I have an amazing husband. :: I am driven by passion. :: I have a temper. :: I stand firm in my beliefs. :: I speak my mind. :: I am Southern. :: I am an encourager. :: I love modern design. :: I recharge best when I'm alone. :: I crave change often. :: I love hard. :: I dream BIG.

In my few weeks following the Making Things Happen Intensive, I have made more scary decisions, taken more leaps of faith and trusted more people with my vulnerability than I have in my entire life.  And (after the initial anxiety attack, sweating and vomit) it has felt wonderful.

Sometimes it is okay for things to be about you.  Not in a selfish way - but in a way of constant self evaluation and growth.  I would encourage you to take time every month to evaluate how you dealt with the obstacles that came your way in the past 30 days.  Did you take every opportunity to love life?  Did you invest in others?  Did you operate your day-to-day under the premise of honesty and integrity? If not, tomorrow is a new day and it can all change.  The best way to grow is to learn.  From yourself, from those you aspire to be like, from literature, etc.

I mentioned earlier that I crave change.  That is true, I have never lived in a town longer than 5 years. Ever.  It makes me crazy and I start to feel as though my wings are clipped.  I have passed that 5 year mark this past August.  And it made me realize why I crave change.

The people that have known me for the better part of the 5+ years I have lived here would tell you I have grown as a person, I have chased my dreams, I have pressed my luck and I am pretty cool.  I like that.  I like that people would say that about me.  So, to me, now seems like the perfect time to make my exit.  The challenge that I am facing now is that we are staying.  That I have to become REAL and VULNERABLE with these people.  They love me & deserve to see the bad with the good. 

This has caused me to do an immeasurable amount of self- reflection as of late.  People, that is scary.  I am a realist by nature but I have gotten really good at looking past things so I don't have to analyze or deal with them.

I have noticed, even though I have had some of my hardest days in the last couple weeks, I have been happier, more satisfied with my imperfections, laughed more, smiled more, been able to give more of myself to others, and just really felt at peace a ton more often than I have felt stressed.  The characteristics that I listed at the top of this post are the things that I have found out about myself and embraced.  As crazy as it sounds, getting to know myself has been such a liberating experience. 

Honesty is freedom.  I encourage you to take the leap and dig deep into you.  If you really let go and be vulnerable about everything, you will benefit dramatically.

XO,

Lauren

8 comments:

Amy Rae Photography said...

you are am amazing person Lauren!! you have a lot to give to others and a passion that is real! maybe it is that red hair! ;) today i was sweating and felt like I could throw up! But you just get through it and then breathe. Then wait to see if it will pay off.

Emily Ley said...

AMEN!!! That's all I have to say! AMEN!! Girl you're going to rock it this year. Seriously- and I LOVE LOVE LOVE your red hair! You're going to make such big things happen this year and I love how honest and open you are on your blog too. Im so lucky to have met you guys at MTH. Like Lara said, we all have a bunch of new BFFs for life now!

the kriegels said...

your "xo" reminded me that we met five years ago this week!! i hope all of the changes are working out for the best for you guys!

Adam and Cassidy said...

Okay . . . the title of your post makes me think of that song "I am Rosemary's granddaughter. A splitting image of my father. And my momma's still my biggest fan!!" And then I thought of you singing it in the Dot voice. Don't ask haha!

Lucky + Lovely said...

Beautiful, refreshing, honest and real. I wish I had gone to MTH to meet you! I am inspired by your post and I wish you all the best on your journey.

southernfete said...

Amazing post! So nice to have other "lady" entreprenuers going through the same thing to stay encouraged. You are going to do amazing things and I'm glad to get to watch it happen! We have all been bitten by the bug! I have a similar post coming tomorrow.

cloverstl said...

I have been so inspired by everything that the first class of MTH have learned, I can only imagine as more of the intensives occur how much more we will all learn and how much we will reflect on who we are each individually. I am printing out your questions about evaluating life ever 30 days. I think it is a GREAT reminder to take in everything, grow from others, and learn from it all. Thank you!

Latrice of Opulent Couturier said...

Thank you for your transparency! As someone that is still sorting things out from MTH Nashville, your feelings are reassuring because I am feeling the same way!!

The best is yet to come for you!!!

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